The orders of angels. Around 500 AD a writer calling himself Dionysius the Areopagite arranged them into nine choirs in three triads: seraphim, cherubim and thrones nearest God; dominions, virtues and powers in the middle; principalities, archangels and angels nearest us. Gregory the Great ordered them differently. Aquinas sided with Dionysius. Dante settled it poetically, saying that when Gregory reached heaven he laughed at his own mistake. The Great Chain of Being was a ranking handed down as fixed; here it is argued instead. Rank each order by nearness to God as the tradition reasoned it: what the order does, what it sees, and how much of the hierarchy would collapse without it. Maimonides kept a separate list of ten ranks with the chayot at the top, and Islam names its own archangels, so aspects are welcome for other traditions' orderings. Vote with the sources in the explanation.